Mother’s Derogating Father to Children Leads Appeals Court to Order That Father Get Custody,
From In re Marriage of Shada, decided Wednesday by the Iowa Court of Appeals, in an opinion by Judge Gina Badding, joined by Judges Samuel Langholz and Michael Mullins:
David … challenges the district court’s decision to place their three minor children in Nicole’s physical care. He argues that Nicole “is not supportive of the children’s emotional needs, she is profane in her communications with the children and does not support the children’s relationship with [him].” The court discussed those issues but found they were outweighed by Nicole’s role as the children’s primary caretaker. We disagree on our de novo review of the record and modify the decree to place the children in David’s physical care….
Because David does not contest the district court’s decision to deny joint physical care, the only issue before us is which parent should serve as the children’s primary caretaker. Our focus in resolving this issue is the best interests of the children…. Generally, courts … the suitability of parents, whether the children will suffer from lack of contact with and attention from both parents, quality of parental communication, the previous pattern of caregiving, and each parent’s support of the other.
With those factors in mind, David argues that he is the more suitable parent because Nicole’s “attitude toward her daughters … is quite negative,” she generally dismisses the children’s feelings and mental health, she places the children in the middle of parenting issues, and she does not support the children’s relationship with David….
We have long recognized “[t]he fact a parent was the primary caretaker prior to separation does not assure he or she will be the custodial parent.” We think this is especially true with a father like David who, although he was the family’s primary breadwinner, was not uninvolved like Nicole would have us believe.
The district court recognized this to a certain extent, finding that while it had “no doubt that Nicole has been the primary caregiver for the children throughout the years,” the court was “not saying that David hasn’t parented the children.” Instead, the court concluded that his “role in caring for the children did not ever consistently rise to the level of Nicole caring for the children.” But David correctly challenges the quality of that caretaking and its eff
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